Ok, confession. I should be! Should be a master at small talk because I was a bartender for almost a decade. But here's my excuse for not being a sensei at this. People like to talk in a bar anyway, and with a drink or two, people loosen up.
But anyway, having been a bartender, I do have a few VERY basic tricks up my sleeve about this topic that I'm going to share.
First stop--Don't sweat it if you're shy. I wouldn't consider myself as shy. Not being shy can be a plus, but a downside too because shyness can be a good thing. I mean, who wants to talk to the obnoxious loudass? *not me*
Secondly, small talk has something to do with rhythm. You can't just randomly say hello, etc. You gotta say it at the right time--like when someone is listening, otherwise you waste your move and get left hanging.
Here's another good trick, don't do all the talking. Sometimes people really want to be the one talking--and then you'll be finding all sorts of ways to get out of listening to that one fast! Yikes!
But the challenge comes when you're small talking with someone who's got these rules down. Then they expect you to have some kind of arsenal of cool things to say.
1- witty repertoire
2-really cool/funny quick story
3-information, but related like you lived it, not like you read it
4-if all else fails sarcasm (I'm not a big fan of this one because this one is tonal, and people who aren't careful and smart about sarcasm, can end up hurting feelings. The whole point of sarcasm is what, upperhand? Lame.
Anyways, that's my small talk for now.
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