Psychology Perspectives--Cultural Opinions and Such

Psychology is a cultural direction that is steeped in logic and pseudo-science. Why I say pseudo-science is because any psychologist/psychiatrist worth their salt will tell you that medications they prescribe are not specific--it targets multiple pathways/neurotransmitters and may not necessarily pinpoint the actual disorder, but treats the symptoms of that disorder. Neural pathways are not completely well-understood.

I am in an excellent position to compare and contrast cultural aspects of psychology. Thirteen years of my life was spent living in a different country where what is considered visual or auditory hallucinations in the psych ward, is normal part of everyday life.

Ghosts. Yes, ghosts. Who hasn't seen ghosts? Or who hasn't had a close encounter? When I returned to the Philippines two years ago, I almost laughed out loud when my host told me a story of the appearance of the ghost in her car. It took me a while to figure out she was serious. This is a woman who is smart, savvy, well-connected and well-to-do. This was not a solitary episode of someone who needed some antipsychotic meds. A week or two later, I re-visited my mom's hometown, where a single large rock is said to be the house of the ghosts of the village. None of my cousins dared to go walk in the dark, for fear of this rock.

Fast forward a few years later, I am in clinical conference role playing, discussing what to do should a patient reveal that they see ghost. “Hm....Let's talk about your medicine. How's that working out for you?” (Well, not exactly in that order of approach for psych patients.) But we are trained to say, "I understand that you see something, I do not see what you're seeing" “Do you have any questions about your medication?”-- Or something to that effect. Of course, in the psychentific world, ghosts do not exists. And there's a label for me creating that word "psychentific" that is not exactly complementary to my state of mind.

Other things that are drastically different and can lead into psych hospitalizations: Anger Expressions--It is absolutely not acceptable to threaten your neighbor. "Papatayin kita" or “I will hurt you” is not acceptable, taken very seriously and could land you jail time, not just a psych evaluation. It is also not kosher to chase your neighbor with an ax--which by the way occurred in our neighborhood when I was growing up. This is called "Homicidal Ideation"—well, perhaps, not ideation, more like intention.

There are many more happenings that are simply not acceptable. One particular cultural phenomena that I am curious as to how it would be interpreted by my Psych professor is the annual ritual of hundreds of people who re-enact the death of Christ by actual hanging on the cross each year, right about this time of the year. I approached my psych professor with these questions and concerns. My psych professor countered that these cultural phenomena do not necessarily indicate that the whole country would need psychological evaluation. She gave an example of the practice of circumcision--an aesthetic procedure that continues in the first world despite lack of beneficial evidence. The procedure, should you get a chance to watch it is precisely brutal. (And blast it! I’ll say that it’s cruel and unfortunately usual!)

But what makes one thing acceptable, and not the other? I go back to the lecture and the subsequent conversation--the crucial point to consider is that how much of one's behavior impedes one's ability to function within a cultural/social context. This is why threatening your neighbor is unacceptable, cutting a little baby boy’s foreskin doesn’t impede normal functions, and believing you see ghosts can land you a prescribed antipsychotic dose, in a society where logic and science has been embraced as the-end-all-be-all.

And I step back a little further and I start to wonder, how much of the "outsider" belief is discarded when one moves into the "melting pot". Is it really a melting pot? Social scientists have described this country a "tossed salad" phenomena--that is to say that many people manage to retain their flavor/consistency/characteristics despite being mixed into the whole, retaining their unique belief or beliefs and cultural practices.

By no means am I trying to discount psychology. This branch of thought has been very useful in clearing the cobwebs of many minds, including mine. It has been a life-saving tool and I could keep on and on about the joys of psychology. But too much logic can be downright boring, i.e. Gwyneth Paltrow’s conscious uncoupling. Where’s the fun in that? Talk about muted colors of washed out greys.

The core of America—is a true lack of cultural homogeneity (regardless of the colorful and loud Miley Cyruses, the Kanye/Kardashians, etc). TV aside, many withdraw from society, deep into themselves, isolated in thought, magical thinking, hiding in the potential sickness of the mind, coloring themselves with their most favorite fantasies. Because we all are-- stars-- though momentarily embarrassed or without the spotlight.

I also see psychology’s attempt to mute down the colors of personalities by labeling, grouping, classifying, and predicting behaviors. This process sometimes help people tone their colors down by co-creating new schemas and logical lenses from where which to see the world. Frequently, this process is not enough because for change to occur, it requires insight, digging deeply that is frequently a lonely process, a long personal quest. Subsequently, steady the mind so that insight might could occur--Meds!

And the most common patient complaint I heard is “why the f* do I have to take this meds?!?” Well…they have a point, considering the side effects such as Tardive Dyskinesia, and Serotonin syndrome, to name a few. Why choose to see one way to look at life (the psych way), when they can pop an illicit pill that gives them stars in their eyes, sensational textures, and damn the side effects. Considering the pills from both choices (illicit or prescribed) have side effects! Just my two cents.

PS. The above written piece is just a quick survey of my thoughts. I promised to share this writing with my psych professor so quite possibly I'll have to do part deux or edit and I'll have to write more scientifically considering my audience.

A change of self

My art direction---for a moment I just replied, Just pretty--an expression of pretty.  Then I thought abut how tattoo artists do it.  They ask the person what they want and draw the inspiration from that...the skill/talent is a tool for others' self-expression.

So art--I just released "a change of self"--a definition of where my art is...where I am...

pursuit of increased self-awareness.  

One of the things I love about nursing school is the constant self-analysis and analysis of other people and their feelings.  For self analysis, we look into how we handled the situation--was it centered, best-action, and therapeutic? how was our tone of voice, what we said.  Did what we did, match up with what we desired to do?  

So, I'm applying the process to myself regarding my art.  I'm examining my purpose--

Sometimes, there's a part of me where I feel that if my art is ignored, I am ignored.  But then I remember that I'm making art for me....it's my cathartic motion.  

....And oftentimes a change of self is more needed than a change of scene....

Creating a Comfy Cottage--Part 2

Creating Comfy is a process. Unstructured mess has no place in comfy, at least in my opinion. Too much structure, OCD--isn't comfy. So I create little partitions in my head--this desk is the messy desk, for a period of time. This period of time when I have a lot of work to do, is a messy time.  And yes, I find it's more convenient to be organized when I have a lot of time. Oh, and organizing time is another story. Bottom line is, sometimes structured times and structured spaces are not possible when one has a little fellow. So a cottage w/ toys everywhere happens. (I have strategic toy bins where everything is thrown in for a quick organizing spree). But because of the number of toys, we had to build in a little sunroom/play room. Here's our result.

Also, if you want to talk about true comfy, you have to go with a wood stove. There's nothing like real, live fire warming your bones in the dead of winter. We found this wooden stove on Craigslist for a steal. Even with the unavoidable work that comes with a wooden stove like cleaning the hearth, and getting the wood, ---building and watching the fire, is deliciously primordial.

 

This is my son's little wagon which serves to deliver wood to our cottage when it's not be used as his "vroom, vroom"

 Some new additions--I love this rug! It adds a feminine touch to our unfinished kitchen.

Finally, don't forget, you can't have comfy without a garden. It's almost spring and it's time to plan a garden!  This is what is in our garden forecast.  I've got some okra, cucumber, squash, Brussels sprouts, red peppers, and mint for the summer mojitos....

Let me know how you create your comfy home. :)

Is there room for art?

My blogging has been pretty sporadic. I can't promise that 2014 is going to be any different. Writing about life is now a luxury, as is making art. I know this comes with the territory of being a mother and a student. My neck aches from holding the baby, who chose today to throw a temper tantrum that couldn't be pacified by a walk in the park. I think he is having another one of his growth spurts or teething/toothing. So he's napping right now, and I've quasi-cleaned the house (dishes are done) and I've got the shopping done, and I've got three weeks of break from school. So here I am doing me time that is, more than the basic me time of exercise/meditation/yoga. Woohoo!

The other day, I managed to get into a community winter art show at one of my favorite art spaces in downtown Durham. This is the only showing I have this year. In fact, this is one of the few pieces that I was able to finish before the baby was born. So if you look at the brush strokes of this piece, you'll see that it is crude. I was 40 lbs heavier and huffing and puffing as I was was balancing on chairs in order to finish this piece called "In the Valley of the gods"(sometime last January, I shared the story via facebook/blog.) And I got into a discussion with my partner over why I'm making this difficult, herculean effort in order to show this piece. He said something about this being about my ego. And I'm thinking to myself, ego? What ego? It's a fact that Nobody cares about art of the little, not famous, artist. Making art has cost me $, along w/ tears and sweat, for one random like, and often dismissal by too many people, for this to be about ego. And here I am w/ a screaming baby and I'm still working on my ego??

So, I replied, nursing school is about serving others, doing fundraiser for typhoon victims is for others, playing music is for the enjoyment of others, when do I get to do something that is purely for me?-- This is it. This is for me. This is my art. This is an expression of me beyond the duties and demands of everyday life.

"And isn't that the root of every despicable action? Not selfishness, but precisely the absence of a self." Howard Roark from The Fountainhead

Creating a Comfy Cottage --(one room at a time)

So a couple of blogs back, I mentioned that the saws and drills were buzzing around me. My father has a cottage which he has had Duff build last year. It's not completely finished and haphazardly furnished when I began living here after my return from Georgetown, SC to finish a nursing program at UNC-CH.

One of my goals while living here in the next two years, is to make it cute, and comfy from inside to outside--garden/landscape included--my way of thanking my folks for being supportive of us while I'm in school. The creative spirit in me is not going to sleep. Though I have to say that my creativity is constrained by academia (limited time) and student budget.

So we're going to do this, one room at a time.

Starting with the bathroom. I'm attaching a photo of the bathroom, most of the items are finds, repurposed, etc.

I have to say, Duff has some kind of radar for finding useful items.

1.The circular shower. This shower was returned in the box by someone else at Lowes Hardware store. The box is all torn up and so it's resold at considerably reduced in price. :)

2. The matching circular towel shelf--from the Habitat store. It's $40, but the manager, who was holding our son Noah at time of purchased, informed us that everything was half off. Then at the register, he asked while winking, $10 is half of $40, right? We said, Yes :)

3. The handtowel holder is another score from the Habitat store. I think I paid $1.00 for it.

4. The medicine cabinet was purchased by my dad for $30 from someone else who was upgrading their house.

5. The wall colors, which caused a heated discussion between us is a mis-tint from Lowes for $5. I painted the wall and wanted to do an accent wall. This painting process occurred during night time. I saw this blue and it reminded me of us living by the Malibu ocean. So I wanted to paint one wall this refreshing color. The other color--white, is an antique white, and I wanted to do a wash. Duff wanted me to mix the two to create a new and original color and paint the bathroom walls just one color. (By the way, that's what I consider my expertise--color creation or coming up with just that right tint.) But well, perhaps, it was the time constraint getting to me. But I didn't want to mix the two, so we ended up doing an accent wall instead and Duff painted over my beautiful antique wash with that plain antique white color.

When we woke up the next day, I didn't like the mistinted Malibu ocean color in the daylight. Lesson learned, don't choose your colors at night! But aaaahhhh! We'll have to redo that another day, because we are now slowly working on Noah's sunroom/playroom! Photos to come soon....

Lets talk about Nutrition!

This past summer I took a nutrition class and I learned some things about myself. I've got an attitude problem.

I almost made a C on this class, because I became careless with a project thinking that I know it all. But the thing is, there's sooooo much to learn! I'm just like typical Joe Bloe in that I really don't want to think about what I'm eating. Eating is so personal, private--someone telling me what to eat is like being a little kid again with mom telling me to finish the food I put on my plate. It's annoying. I'm a grown up. I mean, food is one of the basic pleasures in life and to think about it seems counterintuitive to pleasure. "I am not overweight, so I figured I eat well. I don't drink a lot of sodas or sweet desserts. My eating habit is fine," at least that's my self talk.

There's a website I recommend where you can record your eating habits. Choosemyplate.gov The site has a lot of good information on food intake and what your body needs. But I'm not going to tell you you should do this or that too. I just want to put that information out there just in case you're tempted to do a food diary.

Ok, so first thought that popped in my head is: every single person knows their own need. Why would I look at a label that tells me what I need based on an average 2000 kcal diet. Who is this average? I am a fairly intuitive person, I trust my intuition, I'm not some average. So what I learned regarding this attitude is that,our minds like habits. Looking at my grocery list, I can say that there is a general pattern to what I purchase. They're practically the same things everyweek/month. Most people have this general pattern that makes making purchases easy. Once we are locked in a pattern/habit, we generally lose some of that intuition--the body saying give me healthy carbs can be misunderstood into give me more sugar. SEE !!!

Something else I learned--we can tell ourselves we are eating healthy but closer examination shows otherwise! For example, being Asian, I'm a rice girl. I found this picture online and this is how I view myself regarding rice. I've been telling myself for a long time--I'm a rice eater....

until I did the food diary project. I was actually not eating enough rice! My diary showed corn, potatoes, bread as my carbohydrate main sources, not rice. Also, the nutrition journals talk about switching from white rice to brown rice. They recommend the switch to brown rice based on these things called fiber. Also switch from white bread to whole wheat. Do I really have to have 20g of fiber everyday? Who is telling me this? The government.

Geese louise! The government. I'm a political scientist by education--but generally, I'm one of those quasi hippies who as a whole mistrusts the government. Why is the government telling me I should eat 20 g of fiber? When did the government start caring? Here's something else to consider--the government has been adding things to our food--like why is flouride on our water, or why are flours enriched and why is Vitamin D added to milk by the milk manufacturers, or why is Iodine in our salt? This is kind of scary, right? Well, I did a bit of research and it looks like the efforts of some determined physicians led to the addition of these nutrients to our diet. It's not really the government, per se. Also the American Heart Association also says the same thing about fiber. (Btw, I like them. They seem trustworthy with that cute little logo of heart on cereal boxes).

Just as a side note about the government-- I think it is to the government's best interest to get Americans to be healthy. Why? Healthcare cost, especially with the new Obamacare..... But I maintain my skepticism.

Aside from the hassle of paying attention to what I eat, I have to learn the science behind them. Like eating more avocados (technically, that's easy, because I like avocados). Avocados are said to lower blood cholesterol because it has this thing called HDL that takes the fat away from cells into the liver where they can be destroyed.

Funny.... I wrote on my food diary that I'll eat more fat because I'm eating way below my 20g that's recommended by these nutritionists whom I have never met! The key is eat 20 g "OR LESS" of fat. (Anyway, my nutrition teacher allowed me to re-write my food diary, earning me an A for that project.)

But these is the general attitude and approach that I had towards food. *Mild hostility* because I'm not fat. Can you imagine the kind of feelings/unspoken thoughts people go through when someone tells them what to eat because they're fat? Or maybe some of these people are not thinking, just eating.

I encourage anyone who's reading my blogs to pay attention to what you eat, because it's so easy to alter your thoughts based on consistent intake of some chemical whether it vitamins, drug, etc.

Optimistic Juice...

So one of the things you do when you go back to school is sacrifice comfort. I wish I could write these blog when everything is picture perfect. But life isn't always that way. So I think a little honest picture of where I'm at may be in order.

I'm living with my son Noah, in a cottage which my father built for family guests last year. The cottage is one bedroom, with a kitchen and bathroom. On the side is a little family garden, where I planted heirloom tomatoes when I got back from South Carolina this past summer and started school. And ripe tomatoes are coming in, coupled with the fresh sweet grapes, and cucumber. **See, just when I am close to running out of optimistic juice to write about, then it keeps pouring. I can't stop being optimistic and finding something to be grateful for to write about, where the other part of me see only the mess of moving and re-starting.**

So, I made the decision to move from Georgetown, South Carolina after the Krazy Fish craziness. I talked to some close friends about this, but haven't completely analyzed my feelings in order to express my thoughts. All I can say is that southern crazy is crazy, and crazy is as crazy does and Kenneth Carl Terry is crazy. I saw this disaster coming a year ago and I tried to warn Duff about it, but oh well. I'm not happy about the negative publicity and Duff being associated with it. To be fair, Duff has done moves to disassociate himself from it. But as they say, "tongues would wag". Do they stop wagging?

The friend that I talked to in New York do not understand the scenario, because New York craziness is different from small town drama. So perhaps, that's part of the reason why I'm struggling to write about it because how do I bridge the gap of cultural/social disparity? It's difficult to describe social constructs that everyone "understands".

Anyway, I moved back to North Carolina to start school and all these moves happened in a space of one week!! So we sacrificed some comfort in order to live close to my folks. They are so helpful when I have last minute assignments to do.

I'm in my 3 week summer vacation, and at this time Duff is building an extra room in the cottage so that my son Noah can have a little room to call his own. Everything is in disarray and the saw is buzzing away in the background. And I hope the little room is finished before school restarts.

For now, I'll munch away at ripened grapes that we somehow managed to rescue from the theivin' squirrels.